TGIF

My first workweek of the year is over. It was actually only half a week. Epiphany is a holiday where I work.

I ended my first workday on Wednesday with friends at our favorite bar. We had a tasty dinner, together with the husband, and it was good to catch up with everyone.

Thursday night was quiet. Nicely quiet. I called the husband at the clinic, took a bubble bath, watched some documentaries and went to bed super early. I felt very rested when I woke up this morning.

Today, I treated myself for a, workwise, very good start into the year with take-out Chinese food and a glass of wine. You cannot treat yourself often enough, right?

What leaves me a bit worried after week 1 is that I still feel quite stressed out. One would think that three and a half weeks off and a total of four weeks away from the office left me recharged and refreshed. I ended last year feeling tired, agitated, and nervous. I even had to stay at home for a week in the beginning of December. The last year was just too much, I guess. During the long vacation I felt better very quickly. However, coming closer to the first day at work made me feel nervous again. It’s not that I don’t like my job. I actually love it! LOVE IT! If you asked me what I do, I’d fill three pages with it. About a fascinating and complex study, about the topics that we research, what struggles we face and how rewarding it is when we overcome these struggles, about great people I frequently get to meet and how fruitful the discussions are that I have with them.

What I absolutely dislike, however, is its pace. This pace makes it hard to stick to one task at a time. Even thinking about it makes my stomach turn. Before the husband got sick I was able to manage it. But I knew I was on the edge. Once he got sick it became harder and harder for me to cope. Especially with all those business trips.

And then there was Paris…

Something that makes all these problems seem small. It was only tonight when I realized the extent of the terror! I heard about the attacks of course on the radio in the mornings and I read headlines in the newspaper. I didn’t get around to really read more than the headlines, though. Today there where flags at half-mast and news specials about the happenings of January 7th and today. My heart goes out to the families of the victims. And I pray that freedom of speech stays unharmed.